Paul McCartney once wrote "And in the End, the love you take is equal to the love you make." It's a seemingly neat little sentiment, very poetic, but is downright wrong. The Love most songs and movies speak of is a very selfish, self-centered, and by these standards a transaction, as opposed to a sacrifice. The people in our songs, movies, and written media are all about themselves. "I can't live without you," means that "I have a desire for you that must be fulfilled, and I'm going to tantrum until I get what I want."
This transactional love that we've come to buy because of the things we fill our heads with is our fault. Let's take a look at the state of our world. We have girls who've compromised living with or sleeping with a guy to keep him around, stating they never want to get married, and yet are watching wedding shows constantly. We have people chanting "love is love" while exposing children to strip teases and sexuality, when kids should not have to have that burden thrust upon them and just enjoy childhood. We have people who are depressed or committing suicide because they did every thing they could to please others, and yet it is never enough. Why? Because as a society we feed this idea through our romance stories, love songs, and literature. As a group, we perpetuate this idea that love is based on what you give, and you get back what you give. Love is not a transaction! Love is the ultimate choice to sacrifice your wants, wishes and desires for the sake of someone else.
Jesus said "Greater love has no man than this, than to sacrifice for his friends (John 15). Paul reiterates this point about Christ, the Church, and Marriage in Ephesians 5:
"25Â Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, 26Â that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, 27Â so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish."
We don't give ourselves up, we take what we want, and when we stop getting, we stop giving. Love has become a selfish word. If you want to know true love, sacrifice without expectation. Give without hoping for a return, love without stipulations. Then watch as you feel God's love pouring in to you, unexpectedly, and yet satisfying and complete.
1 Corinthians 13:4-8 English Standard Version (ESV)|
4Â Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant 5Â or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful;[a] 6Â it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. 7Â Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.
8Â Love never ends. As for prophecies, they will pass away; as for tongues, they will cease; as for knowledge, it will pass away. Footnotes
1 Corinthians 13:5 Greek irritable and does not count up wrongdoing
