I’ve been sitting on this topic for a few days now. I see people I’ve counseled, warned, and later married end up getting divorced, I see kids who I love dearly compromising everything by living with and doing worse with those who have no commitment to them, I see marriage not being held in honor by the Church. And I can honestly say this, full offense meant: if you are not holding in high regard what God has ordained, you’re in rebellion against His design, and you’re walking on dangerous ground! Does this mean we can’t or won’t be forgiven of sins within marriage, divorce, or sexual sin outside of God ordained marriage? Not at all. God’s grace was decided at the Cross where Christ was crucified. But this does NOT give us leave to continue in sin.
Don’t mistake me: I know people cheat, spouses leave, and there are abuses and things like that. But we, as a society, and even within the church, treat marriage as such a common thing. The world says marriage is just a piece of paper, but God ordained it in the very beginning! Yet, we have decided that for financial reasons, when my feelings aren’t there any more, when it gets too hard, I can just leave. This is also why so many people don’t get married, because they feel it doesn’t work. Here’s the real reason: we don’t take our vows seriously. For better or worse, richer or poorer, sickness and in health, we made a promise. What we really mean is for my better or worse, and my richer and poorer, my sickness and health, but when it gets too tough, I don’t want to deal with your garbage. The real sad case is this: we made a promise and decided not to keep it.
In other cases, we have people who live together without making that commitment, and keep a door open in case they want out. I say this, as people did to me (and I didn’t listen), it is better to stay single, stay whole (not partaking in sexual acts), and focus on Christ until (and only if) He sends us someone who’s willing to do things on His terms than to be used, and to use God’s sacred gifts to satiate our own selfishness or to try and fill a void in our life. You matter to God. Your wholeness matters to God, and if you’re broken, like I was, He can make you whole again. It’s hard. It requires picking up your cross (and dying on it) every day. But I can promise you, if we seek God’s will and God’s way, though it is the harder road, it’s where true peace, and joy, and comfort are. God ordained marriage, sexuality, and all such things, and yes, He did so also for our enjoyment and pleasure. Let us hold them as holy, sacred, and enjoy them as He ordained, not as the world seeks to do.
Hebrews 13:1-21
Let brotherly love continue. Do not neglect to show hospitality to strangers, for thereby some have entertained angels unawares. Remember those who are in prison, as though in prison with them, and those who are mistreated, since you also are in the body. Let marriage be held in honor among all, and let the marriage bed be undefiled, for God will judge the sexually immoral and adulterous. Keep your life free from love of money, and be content with what you have, for he has said, “I will never leave you nor forsake you.” 6 So we can confidently say,
“The Lord is my helper; I will not fear; what can man do to me?”
Remember your leaders, those who spoke to you the word of God. Consider the outcome of their way of life, and imitate their faith. Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever. Do not be led away by diverse and strange teachings, for it is good for the heart to be strengthened by grace, not by foods, which have not benefited those devoted to them. We have an altar from which those who serve the tent have no right to eat. For the bodies of those animals whose blood is brought into the holy places by the high priest as a sacrifice for sin are burned outside the camp. So Jesus also suffered outside the gate in order to sanctify the people through his own blood. Therefore let us go to him outside the camp and bear the reproach he endured. For here we have no lasting city, but we seek the city that is to come. Through him then let us continually offer up a sacrifice of praise to God, that is, the fruit of lips that acknowledge his name. Do not neglect to do good and to share what you have, for such sacrifices are pleasing to God.
Obey your leaders and submit to them, for they are keeping watch over your souls, as those who will have to give an account. Let them do this with joy and not with groaning, for that would be of no advantage to you.
Pray for us, for we are sure that we have a clear conscience, desiring to act honorably in all things. I urge you the more earnestly to do this in order that I may be restored to you the sooner.
Now may the God of peace who brought again from the dead our Lord Jesus, the great shepherd of the sheep, by the blood of the eternal covenant, equip you with everything good that you may do his will, working in us that which is pleasing in his sight, through Jesus Christ, to whom be glory forever and ever. Amen.

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