Children Won’t Grow to Fear God if You Raise Them as the Center of the Universe

I used to be amazed at the amount of entitlement and arrogance in the world. I see young people whose lives are ruled by their emotions, who lash out at anyone that disagrees with them as if they are entitled to only be affirmed one hundred percent of the time. The degree of narcissism that exists in the world is astounding, but the source is not all too surprising. If you want to figure out where it comes from, watch a child interact with his or her parents. Kids are allowed to fuss, fight, and curse out their parents, and some treat it as cute, saying “my child is assertive.” They are allowed to interrupt conversations, own thousand-dollar cell phones (and when they wreck them, they get a replacement almost immediately), have whatever devices they want in their room, and dictate to their parents when they go in and out.

There is a general lack of respect for parents at home, and so these kids grow up to feel entitled to the same “center of the universe” treatment when they grow up. But let us remember the first commandment with a promise: “Honor your father and your mother, that your days may be long in the land that the Lord your God is giving you” (Exodus 20:12). Why is this commandment so important? Because if a child does not grow up in a healthy fear with discipline (notice the word healthy), they will not develop a healthy fear and love of God. If they grow up thinking that they’re the center of the Universe, they will not have room on the throne of their heart for anyone but themselves. In other words, Parents, they learn their love and fear and wonder of God from their relationship with you.

Parents, you’re the ones whom God has granted these gifts called children. They will ultimately grow up to make their own choices, but how they grow up more often than not defines how they do so. They will not fear God if they run the house! They will demand worship from everyone if that is what they receive from you. Love and obedience go hand in hand, and it is our job as Parents to learn from the Word so that we can demonstrate that to our kids. I always tell my boys that I don’t care about raising good kids. I want to raise godly young men who honor God in all they do. I want to see them in heaven, and for a time, we may strive with one another if we’re going to achieve that. While they are in my care, there will be discipline, responsibilities, and a releasing to greater things, but it will all be with my guidance. In this, I will do the best I can to be that Christ-like example, so that they will come to understand that HE is the center of all things.

Proverbs 3

My son, do not forget my teaching,

but let your heart keep my commandments,

for length of days and years of life

and peace they will add to you.

Let not steadfast love and faithfulness forsake you;

bind them around your neck;

write them on the tablet of your heart.

So you will find favor and good success

in the sight of God and man.

Trust in the Lord with all your heart,

and do not lean on your own understanding.

In all your ways acknowledge him,

and he will make straight your paths.

Be not wise in your own eyes;

fear the Lord, and turn away from evil.

It will be healing to your flesh

and refreshment to your bones.

Honor the Lord with your wealth

and with the firstfruits of all your produce;

then your barns will be filled with plenty,

and your vats will be bursting with wine.

My son, do not despise the Lord’s discipline

or be weary of his reproof,

for the Lord reproves him whom he loves,

as a father the son in whom he delights.

Blessed is the one who finds wisdom,

and the one who gets understanding,

for the gain from her is better than gain from silver

and her profit better than gold.

She is more precious than jewels,

and nothing you desire can compare with her.

Long life is in her right hand;

in her left hand are riches and honor.

Her ways are ways of pleasantness,

and all her paths are peace.

She is a tree of life to those who lay hold of her;

those who hold her fast are called blessed.

The Lord by wisdom founded the earth;

by understanding he established the heavens;

by his knowledge the deeps broke open,

and the clouds drop down the dew.

My son, do not lose sight of these—

keep sound wisdom and discretion,

and they will be life for your soul

and adornment for your neck.

Then you will walk on your way securely,

and your foot will not stumble.

If you lie down, you will not be afraid;

when you lie down, your sleep will be sweet.

Do not be afraid of sudden terror

or of the ruin of the wicked, when it comes,

for the Lord will be your confidence

and will keep your foot from being caught.

Do not withhold good from those to whom it is due,

when it is in your power to do it.

Do not say to your neighbor, “Go, and come again,

tomorrow I will give it”—when you have it with you.

Do not plan evil against your neighbor,

who dwells trustingly beside you.

Do not contend with a man for no reason,

when he has done you no harm.

Do not envy a man of violence

and do not choose any of his ways,

for the devious person is an abomination to the Lord,

but the upright are in his confidence.

The Lord’s curse is on the house of the wicked,

but he blesses the dwelling of the righteous.

Toward the scorners he is scornful,

but to the humble he gives favor.

The wise will inherit honor,

but fools get disgrace.